Date: Tue, 28 Mar 1995

Elliott Schiff <es2r+@andrew.cmu.edu>

To make the best pizza that you ever tasted,
Follow these words, such that nothing gets wasted:
Preheat the oven: four-two-five degrees.
That's what's required by A.C.H.D.
Now, turn it on early, 'cause you will be waiting
About thirty minutes before you start baking.

First, scrape the pan of burnt cheese and muck
Lest your next pizza will surely be stuck.
Go grab a crust, remove it from plastic.
Place pizza on tray. Be enthusiastic!
The round side is bottom, the flat side is top
Have you tried the other way? It's as messy as slop.

Two helpings of sauce poured from the large ladle
Spread it in circles, like the spin of a dreidel.
Spread it around. To the edge, you know.
You're trying to make pizzas, not wedges of dough.
The sauce isn't tasty without a little spice.
Sprinkle a tablespoon o' 'regano, that would be nice.

Now add the cheese, like you did with the sauce
Don't add too much, (we'd be taking a loss.)
One point five cupfulls is sufficient, I think.
The size of a handfull from brother Mike Pinck.
(A twelve ounce cup is the size that's been chosen.
The cheese will taste funny if it's ever been frozen)

Now place it in the oven (bottom side down)
Your pizza is done when the crust's golden-brown.
What's golden-brown? Is that your trouble?
It's about when the cheese starts to bub-bubly-ubble.
How long will it take? When will it be?
Give it ten minutes, then look and see.

Dave Stott has said, "a prize you will get
If the number of slices ain't in the integer set!"
This motion was made, and the brothers said "Nix!"
So your job is to cut it such that n equals six.
Rotate slices in warmers. Make a FIFO queue.
Put the oldest ones much closer to you.

I've made these instructions clear and concise.
Before I close, here's a piece of advise:
Take the pizza from the oven as carefully as Fitz,
Since the mistakes that you make will become Brother Bits(tm)
Follow my rhymes, and then you will see
Just how delicious your pizza will be.

EllioTT Schiff,     es2r+@andrew.cmu.edu | http://www/not/written/yet.html
The  above statements  are  mine  and do | H-- m+++ p--p** A*t+++ly T--- t++ 
not necessarily  reflect the opinions of | t--- T* r+++ t++ G--- C--- o* a
any other sentient or nonsentient being. | P++s++'s .s--n++u-- f+++? 

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